What Would You Do If I Died?

Published on Mon 08 November 1999

"Dear," said the wife. "What would you do if I died?"

"Why, dear, I would be extremely upset," said the husband. "Why do you ask such a question?"

"Would you remarry?" persevered the wife.

"No, of course not, dear," said the husband.

"Do you not like being married?" said the wife.

"Of course I do, dear," he said.

"Then why would you not remarry?"

"All right," said the husband, "I would remarry."

"You would?" said the wife, looking vaguely hurt.

"Yes," said the husband.

"Would you sleep with her in our bed?" said the wife after a long pause.

"Well yes, I suppose I would," replied the husband.

"I see," said the wife indignantly. "And would you let her wear my old clothes?"

"I suppose, if she wanted to," said the husband.

"Really," said the wife icily. "And would you take down the pictures of me and replace them with pictures of her?"

"Yes. I think that would be the correct thing to do."

"Is that so?" said the wife, leaping to her feet. "And I suppose you would let her play with my golf clubs, too."

"Of course not, dear," said the husband. "She is left-handed."

This joke was tagged #english and #marriage